petite anglaise

light relief – game over

14.06.2005 4:52 pmmisc

Let’s take a step back from the emotional rollercoaster of the past few weeks and take some time out for a little “know your petite” quiz.

The answers to the following questions (multiple choice, because I hail from the GCSE era, just) cannot be found on the blog. It’s all about predicting what you think might be right, from what you know already.

The first person to answer all the questions correctly in the comments box below will receive a very attractive and expensive personalised prize.

1. What is petite’s favourite television programme?

a) Keeping up appearances
b) 24
c) Nip/Tuck I do also like 24, but Nip/Tuck is just so naughty…
d) Navarro

2. Which of the following gentlemen has never graced petite’s bedroom wall?

a) John Taylor (Duran Duran – I was 11)
b) Bernard Sumner (New Order – I was 16)
c) Kurt Cobain (at university)
d) Johnny Depp

I stopped putting people on my wall after things happened to both Kurt Cobain and River Phoenix.

3. If Tadpole had been a boy, which of the following names made it to the shortlist?

a) George
b) Noah
c) Jean-François
d) Milo
e) Alfie

We racked our brains for a name which would work in French and English, but also go with Mr Frog’s Italian surname. We weren’t happy with our choice, but couldn’t think of anything else either. Would have pronounced it “meelo” and I knew nothing of the tweenies at the point, may I add.

4. Which of the following has petite never done?

a) had her belly button pierced
b) bungee jumped off a bridge
c) owned blue doc martens
d) been to a Bryan Adams concert

ahem. That concert. I was 13 and won a ticket. And had to go with my dad. I wish I hadn’t brought it up now…

5. Where did petite meet her current suitor?

a) at a blogmeet
b) at Leeds Bradford airport
c) in her comments box
d) at a speed dating evening
e) he’s an old flame

6. At school was petite…

a) editor of the school newspaper
b) a prefect
c) captain of the hockey team
d) none of the above

7. petite’s ambrosia is:

a) a bacon sandwich and a cup of tea
b) a glass of red wine and some dark chocolate
c) fish, chips and mushy peas, eaten outdoors
d) a jumbo pot of nutella and a spoon

I do like all of the above, but when I wrote the quiz I was hankering after fish and chips eaten out of the wrapper on the seafront at Whitby.

8. if petite was filthy rich, she would dress in:

a) Marc Jacobs
b) Valentino
c) Top Shop, regardless
d) Chanel

9. What is petite’s favourite film of all time?

a) Blue Velvet
b) Paris, Texas
c) Fight Club
d) Donnie Darko

By my calculations, 3.2, Leslie and Nardac all did rather well with 7/9.

88 comments

  1. 1. c)
    2. c)
    3. d)
    4. b)
    5. e)
    6. d)
    7. c)
    8. b)
    9. c)

    French Size 6 please.

    Parkin Pig | 5:35 pm

  2. Five correct answers PP, not bad. But not good enough.

    petite | 5:37 pm

  3. 1. c
    2. c
    3. b
    4. d
    5. e
    6. d
    7. a
    8. a
    9. a

    Although I’m a low rise shorts girl myself (UK 16 – unless my new gym turns out to be very motivational).

    Mags | 5:46 pm

  4. Can I play? I’m too new to know anything at all – but I guessed my way through GCSEs and have carried on guessing my way through life and so far it seems to have paid off! So petite what d’ya say to these:

    1. b)
    2. b)
    3. b) & d)
    4. b)
    5. a)
    6. d)
    7. a)
    8. a)
    9. a)

    ps why only 9?!?

    Mavis | 5:49 pm

  5. 1.a
    2.c
    3.b
    4.b
    5.c
    6.d
    7.a
    8.b
    9.c

    In the unlikely event that the randomly selected above are correct, I’d like to say now that I can live without the prize, thanks anyway.
    And if you really have been to a Bryan Adams concert then, well, I feel the need to confess the same. Not through choice, but through devotion to dumped best friend, in my defence.

    l'autre | 5:59 pm

  6. C’est étrange de deviner des choses si personnelles sur toi… mais bien amusant! Vivement les réponses !
    1.b
    2.b
    3.d
    4.b
    5.e
    6.d
    7.b
    8.a
    9.b

    guillerette | 6:02 pm

  7. 1) b
    2) c
    3) c
    4) d
    5) e
    6) d
    7) b
    8) b
    9) c

    Sheila OConnor | 6:42 pm

  8. 1 – b (surely not a? never heard of d!)
    2 – b (the others all have long hair)
    3 – b (because it’s a nice name)
    4 – d (at least, I should hope not)
    5 – b (odd enough to be true)
    6 – d (or else why would you have included it?)
    7 – b (this would be my choice at any rate)
    8 – a (ditto)
    9 – b (PLEASE not d!)

    I do realise that 6 b’s out of 9 is fairly unlikely, but never mind…

    mike | 6:56 pm

  9. 1 b)
    2 c)
    3 b)
    4 b)
    5 e)
    6 d)
    7 d)
    8 d)
    9 d)

    Rivka | 7:00 pm

  10. 1. C
    2. C
    3. B
    4. B
    5. A
    6. D
    7. C
    8. D
    9. A

    More details about your weekend please!!

    Anna | 7:22 pm

  11. Parkin Pig and Guillerette are doing best so far – 5 out of 9 correct answers. Others pretty dismal – although I do like Mike’s reasoning!

    petite | 7:25 pm

  12. ok, here we go!

    1. B
    2. C
    3. B
    4. B
    5. A
    6. D
    7. C
    8. D
    9. A

    ViVi | 7:42 pm

  13. 1.b
    2.a
    3.e
    4.b
    5.a
    6.a
    7.a
    8.a
    9.b

    Rachel | 7:52 pm

  14. 1(c)
    2(c)
    3(d)
    4(b)
    5(c)
    6(d)
    7(d)
    8(a)
    9(b)

    X-Large cup for my man please!

    nardac | 8:06 pm

  15. Ok, so the new flame is definitely in fact an old flame!!

    Here are my suppositions
    1)B
    2)C
    3)D
    4)B
    5)E
    6)D
    7)D
    8)B
    9)A

    Laura | 8:10 pm

  16. nardac takes the lead… but still not quite there!

    petite | 8:37 pm

  17. ….always determined to win a contest….and who wouldn’t want to win this one!

    1)C
    2)C
    3)D
    4)B
    5)C
    6)D
    7)D
    8)B
    9)A

    Laura | 8:58 pm

  18. 1.C
    2.C
    3.D
    4.B
    5.E
    6.D
    7.C
    8.A
    9.B

    I’ll pay you for the postage to the States or you can give it to my lovely wife, EasyJetSetter.

    Leslie | 9:13 pm

  19. 1 c
    2 d
    3 c
    4 b
    5 c
    6 a
    7 c
    8 a
    9 c

    Bob | 9:48 pm

  20. And then I started to think…how creepy would it be to have someone guess all of the right their first try…like was it luck or are they a stalker. LOL

    Bob | 9:50 pm

  21. Close, but not close enough…

    petite | 9:50 pm

  22. 1 c
    2 d
    3 c
    4 b
    5 c
    6 a
    7 c
    8 b
    9 c

    Bob | 10:26 pm

  23. 1 c
    2 d
    3 c
    4 b
    5 c
    6 a
    7 c
    8 b
    9 a

    Bob | 10:29 pm

  24. 1. b
    2. c
    3. d
    4. b
    5. e
    6. d
    7. b
    8. a
    9. d

    Oh, and you can keep the prize. International shipping and my backside being what they are.

    Bluegrass Mama | 10:35 pm

  25. Bob – three strikes and you are out, I’m afraid. Rules? I’m making them up as I go along. Your first shot was your best.

    petite | 10:37 pm

  26. *sigh* It was worth a try. ;)

    Bob | 10:48 pm

  27. 1.c
    2.a
    3.d
    4.b (>shudder

    Three point two | 11:05 pm

  28. OK. That was a bit annoying. Never try to use that ‘less than’ symbol to emphasise unease at Bryan Adams.

    Part II:

    5.c
    6.d
    7.c
    8.a
    9.a

    Three point two | 11:13 pm

  29. Delurking to guess:

    1. C
    2. C
    3. D
    4. B
    5. E
    6. D
    7. D
    8. A
    9. C

    Susie | 11:17 pm

  30. Well aware of the new rules…..here’s my last go (can you do this again tomorrow….it’s a pretty fun way to avoid work!

    c) Nip/Tuck
    c) Kurt Cobain
    b) Noah
    b) bungee jumped off a bridge
    b) at Leeds Bradford airport (in March?)
    d) none of the above
    c) fish, chips and mushy peas, eaten outdoors
    a) Marc Jacobs
    b) Paris, Texas

    Laura | 11:23 pm

  31. Hilarious!! OK, here’s my go:

    1 c
    2 d
    3 b
    4 d
    5 c
    6 d
    7 all of ‘em!!! (although not at the same time!)
    8 a
    9 a

    I know I probably have a tiny bit of an unfair advantage, but, can’t resist – I love quizzes!!! Even so, most are still guesses of course…

    kjr | 11:27 pm

  32. Here are the votes of the Crinklybee jury:

    1- c
    2- c
    3- b
    4- b
    5- e
    6- d
    7- c
    8- a
    9- b

    jonathan | 11:28 pm

  33. Christ – even I don’t know all the answers but I’ll have a go as I’m desperate for those PANTS! (Bucket size please as I’m still needing to cover post-baby flob!)
    1)b
    2)d
    3)d
    4)b
    5)c
    6)b (that’s a guess!)
    7)Now you’ve got me puzzled … gut says d but I’ve experienced extreme viewings of b!
    8)c
    9)a
    Actually come to think of it do you know all the answers?
    PS M&S are doing Magic Roundabout sticker books! Obviously I’ve had to get one for The Wizzle!

    prawn cocktail crisps | 11:37 pm

  34. Oooh, how I love quizzes!!!!
    1c
    2b
    3d
    4b
    5c
    6a
    7b
    8a
    9b

    If I win, I’ll give the prize to the runner up…

    Maurine au bout du monde | 1:08 am

  35. 1. b) 24
    2. c) Kurt Cobain
    3. d) Milo
    4. b) bungee jumped off a bridge
    5. a) at a blogmeet
    6. a) editor of the school newspaper
    7. c) fish, chips and mushy peas, eaten outdoors
    8. d) Chanel
    9. c) Fight Club

    Big time guesses, but lots of fun!

    Madley | 1:16 am

  36. 1. c
    2. c
    3. d
    4. b
    5. e
    6. d
    7. b
    8. a
    9. b

    delaïdo | 1:48 am

  37. 1. What is petite’s favourite television programme?

    c) Nip/Tuck

    2. Which of the following gentlemen has never graced petite’s bedroom wall?

    c) Kurt Cobain

    3. If Tadpole had been a boy, which of the following names made it to the shortlist?

    b) Noah

    4. Which of the following has petite never done?

    c) owned blue doc martens

    5. Where did petite meet her current suitor?

    e) he’s an old flame

    6. At school was petite…

    d) none of the above

    7. petite’s ambrosia is:

    a) a bacon sandwich and a cup of tea

    8. if petite was filthy rich, she would dress in:

    c) Top Shop, regardless

    9. What is petite’s favourite film of all time?

    c) Fight Club

    wiLLoØ | 1:50 am

  38. 1)b
    2)b
    3)d
    4)b
    5)e
    6)d
    7)d
    8)c
    9)d

    Saida | 6:11 am

  39. Oh, what the hell… I want a thong, a man thong.

    Everything the same except #7. That one’s a bacon sandwich with a cup a tea, (a).

    nardac | 6:54 am

  40. i’ll have a go:

    1 a
    2 b
    3 b
    4 b
    5 e
    6 d
    7 d
    8 c
    9 c

    jimmmy | 7:37 am

  41. 1 (c)
    2 (c)
    3 (b)
    4 (b)
    5 (c)
    6 (c)
    7 (d)
    8 (a)
    9 (a)

    claypot | 7:39 am

  42. 1c
    2b
    3d
    4d
    5a
    6c
    7a
    8b
    9a
    size 36 european ( i think it’s 38 in France ?!)

    Jany | 8:33 am

  43. All (a).

    Easy.

    Germain | 9:12 am

  44. 1. b) 24 because who can resist Jack Bauer
    2. a) John Taylor because I have no idea who it is
    3. b) Noah
    4. b) bungee jumped off a bridge
    5. e) he’s an old flame
    6. b) a prefect
    7. b) a glass of red wine and some dark chocolate
    8. b) Valentino
    9. a) Blue Velvet

    Zebulette | 9:28 am

  45. 1. b
    2. c
    3. b
    4. d
    5. c
    6. d
    7. b
    8. a
    9. b

    annie | 9:31 am

  46. Mwa ha ha ha ha!

    Best shots so far got 7/9.

    petite | 10:06 am

  47. Ok, here goes…
    1. c
    2. b
    3. b
    4. a
    5. e
    6. b
    7. c
    8. a
    9. d

    I haven’t done any kind of comparative analysis of previous answers, so am probably dead wrong. But worth a try…

    rachie | 11:01 am

  48. Back for a second try after time consuming statistical analysis of the possib/probalities which means I’m waaaay behind schedule today:

    1. c)
    2. c)
    3. d)
    4. b)
    5. e)
    6. b)
    7. d)
    8. a)
    9. c)

    I’d guess the new bloke is an old flame who hangs around LBA and comments on your blog.

    And the winner is……………….

    Parkin Pig | 11:22 am

  49. Good god i have no idea. Not that I don’t read your blog. But I am horrible at multiple choice. Essay anyone?

    Owen | 12:05 pm

  50. Any closer now?

    1. C
    2. C
    3. D
    4. B
    5. C
    6. D
    7. B
    8. C
    9. B

    Anna | 12:46 pm

  51. What we need here is someone who was a Mastermind champion. Not as in ‘Specialist Subject; The Life and Times of Petite Anglaise’ (although such expertise would be useful), but as in the eponymous 1970s board game with the little coloured beads slotted into holes, where you have to crack the hidden code set by your opponent, who would tell you how many beads you had got right in successive guesses- until you ran out of guesses and the code-setter won.

    Anyone with a Mastermind board to hand could crack Petite’s code in minutes, I’m sure.

    jonathan | 12:57 pm

  52. 1. c)
    2. a)
    3. d)
    4. d)
    5. c)
    6. d)
    7. a)
    8. a)
    9. b)

    aym | 1:40 pm

  53. My turn!

    1. C
    2. A
    3. D
    4. D
    5. E
    6. D
    7. C
    8. A
    9. A

    suziboo | 3:04 pm

  54. 1. c
    2. c
    3. d
    4. d
    5. b
    6. d
    7. c
    8. a
    9. b

    Alan | 3:08 pm

  55. 1. c Nip/Tuck
    2. a John Taylor
    3. d Milo
    4. b bungee jumped off a bridge
    5. e old flame
    6. d none of the above
    7. b wine and chocolate
    8. c Top Shop
    9. a Blue Velvet

    Ninox | 3:09 pm

  56. 1. c
    2. c
    3. d
    4. b
    5. e
    6. d
    7. d
    8. a
    9. d

    Am I right or am I right?

    Tanya | 4:13 pm

  57. Can I play again?

    1. c) Nip/Tuck
    2. c) Kurt Cobain
    3. d) Milo (though hard to say without knowing that actual Tadpole name…!)
    4. b) bungee jumped off a bridge
    5. e) he’s an old flame (could it be a lady by the name of Mavis…?)
    6. d) none of the above
    7. a) a bacon sandwich and a cup of tea
    8. b) Valentino
    9. a) Blue Velvet

    I’m going to win…I can feel it!

    Mavis | 5:27 pm

  58. 5. c) in her comments box

    What!! Here? Damn… had I but known we might be able to woo Petite here, I would have totally started flirting my butt off. Granted, I probably wouldn’t have had much of a chance – being female and heterosexual, and as far as I know, Petite also being female and heterosexual – but still! Damn, damn, damn!

    All right. Own up. Which of you started flirting with Petite with out letting the rest of us in on our chance? (A brilliant strategy, I must add.)

    Ninox | 6:08 pm

  59. Furiously scans past comments to see who has stopped commenting recently…oh wait, that’s me. Am I having an affair with Petite? I don’t think so…am I?

    EasyJetsetter | 6:28 pm

  60. Totally teeth grindingly gutted. My second attempt was further away than the first and I’ve even got the soundtrack to Paris, Texas. I’m probably never ever going to play it again and I’ll continue to buy my own underwear, ta.

    Parkin Pig | 7:39 pm

  61. I had no clue I would have a chance so hooray!! Might I suggest as a tie-breaker, you give us an additional question and Nardac and I can battle it out for the glory. I’m not so desperate for the knickers but I’m all about glory.

    You better not be cheating on me with Petite, EasyJetSetter.

    Leslie | 8:07 pm

  62. er… just to nip any potential interweb rumours in the bud, the commenter referred to in question 5 is male.

    petite | 8:34 pm

  63. Er, Leslie, aren’t you forgetting someone…?

    Three point two | 8:43 pm

  64. I want the thong. Gimme that thong… I’ll start me a three-way thong tug-of-war (and that should get you some nice google search hit results).

    But seriously, what’s going on with the prize?

    nardac | 9:47 pm

  65. I think you went to Rennes last weekend.

    smartie | 10:11 pm

  66. PS> Have you stopped remaining friends with Mr Frog ? You’ve removed that bit from your new summary at the top of your page…

    smartie | 10:13 pm

  67. smartie – I thought the text sounded a bit sappy and too long, but we are still friends, yes. Almost all of the time.

    Nardac, Leslie, “3.2″ – Hmm. What to do about the prize thing? Strictly speaking no-one did actually win. Nardac, I think I can see my way to sending you a petite anglaise thong because I’m sure you are the sort of girl who flashes her knickers and it will be very good publicity for the site. “3.2″ had inside info and should, by rights, be disqualified. Leslie – would you prefer a thong or a petite anglaise mug? Location is not a problem, I can do cafépress.

    Email me with your preferences, vital statistics, mailing address etc (Nardac, can you wait til you are back in Paris?)

    petite | 10:47 pm

  68. 3.2 I’m very sorry. I was on the phone with a client and trying to sound intelligent, which is difficult in the best of times, as I was commenting. I got a little overzealous in the editing, I suppose.

    Leslie | 10:58 pm

  69. But Petite! Just think of the hits that would come your way from a rumoured hot lesbian interweb relationship! All we’d have to do is somehow bring in say a “Hello Kitty” fetish or something, and you’d *own* the web. OWN IT!

    Ninox | 11:56 pm

  70. Well I was excited by the beautiful prize to be won but I fear there’ll be none left since I’m so late.
    J’aurais bien aimé avoir un suspensoir à l’oeil.
    Loupé…….triste Venise..

    GPV | 11:57 pm

  71. I’m with smartie. Jim from Rennes… ;) ?

    claypot | 7:17 am

  72. Petite…IS it Jim from Rennes?? PLEEZE do tell.

    (And pardon my selfish nosiness while you’re at it.)

    “In her comments box” Wow. I never wouuld have guessed.

    sammy | 9:51 am

  73. Aha! The eternal triangle Paris-Sheffield-Rennes?

    Parkin Pig | 10:22 am

  74. Petite is unfortunately rather too busy deleting a tsunami of poker trackback spam this morning to address any of your questions.

    petite | 10:51 am

  75. AARGH!!!

    sammy | 10:57 am

  76. Blimey. I turn my back for 5 minutes, and now I’m a lesbian.

    Jim in Rennes | 11:17 am

  77. My guess is Parkin Pig is your new beau….! Who’s with me on that one?

    Mavis | 11:55 am

  78. Mavis, I’m with you on the Parkin Pig theory. Lesbian theory more exciting tho. Petite, we are waiting….who has stolen your heart and broken ours in front of our very eyes?

    Germain | 12:20 pm

  79. *********(Heart)BREAKING NEWS******************
    A visibly shaken, brokenhearted and tearfully bitter Parkin Pig today sadly issued a formal denial of any romance with the mysterious ‘petite anglaise’.
    He was quoted as saying ‘Chance’d be a fine thing’unquote.
    Observers are now turning their attention towards his rumoured dalliance with a certain Cécilia S. who is telling friends about her taste for ‘pain d’épice’.

    parkin pig | 12:53 pm

  80. Wow the plot certainly thickens. As ever I eagerly await the next page of the ever unfolding story.

    sp999 | 1:13 pm

  81. Exhibit A: I’d like to remind Petite of the post of June 3rd, wherein she includes a quote “especially for you Parkin Pig”

    Exhibit B: On the same day in “her comments box” (is that what you kids are calling it these days?) in reference to Lucy-Jane’s come-on to Jim in Rennes “oi! hands off! He’s all mine and I *don’t* do sharing.”

    Exhibit C: However, 3.2 apparently has insider information. Inside the pink knickers perchance?

    Just gathering evidence…

    It’s funny how the internet brings you closer to people you probably would never have met than you are to some people you see every day eh? Going on a train trip of my own this weekend…Hope it turns out as well as yours seemed to.

    EasyJetsetter | 1:27 pm

  82. Paris, Texas! Love that movie!

    Flare | 3:14 pm

  83. Wow, 82 comments, you are definitly a blog-goddess !
    And, I must say that you’ve got good taste !

    nathan | 3:32 pm

  84. ahhhh – so Nathan its you!!

    Mavis | 4:07 pm

  85. OK, I admit, it’s me. You see, ahem, I am really an extremely hairy yet brutely handsome man.
    ;)

    sammy | 4:40 pm

  86. yeah, it’s me. Nathan.

    (I know what you think. You think i am petite’s suitor… wrong pick !)

    nathan | 4:42 pm

  87. Am rather sad that you only see me as a walking crotch ad. Am thrilled that you think I could ambitious enough to sleep with useful kinds of people… publishers… editors… grey haired expensive spectacled wildly over-cultured types. But, ultimately, am shocked that this is the first outcome of our budding friendship: me wearing knickers with your name plastered all over it.

    But I asked for it. Anyways, I thought it was a man-thong… why am I supposed to wear a man-thong?

    nardac | 6:47 pm

  88. Is Rennes nice? I’d think so.
    There a TGV from Paris isn’t it?
    ;-)

    Maurine au bout du monde | 4:24 am

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