Comments on: fall from grace

By: Jim in Rennes

Jim in Rennes — Tue, 30 Nov 2004 14:05:10 +0000

My two go to their local Catholic school. The reason for this is less religious (1 agnostic parent and 1 atheist) than convenient. Their previous school was Catholic, but only because the local state school had closed (rural depopulation strikes again). This meant the State funded the Catholic system (oh, the irony!). When the girls moved house with their Mum, we looked at both schools in their new village and as the Catholic one used all the same text books etc, we opted for that. As far as I can tell, the only difference to the curriculum is the chance (not enforced) to follow Catechism classes. We’ve left it up to the kids to decide if they want to do it. Frankly, I made up my own mind and I’m sure they’ll do the same. I agree with the “some people believe…” approach, but I suppose I’d be a bit disappointed if they ended up being conventionally religious…

By: David H

David H — Tue, 30 Nov 2004 01:06:23 +0000

I’ve considered myself as an atheist since the age of about 10. For me this means an absence of gods of any description.

There’s no point in being wishy-washy and leaving everything up to your daughter. Do whatever you feel comfy with and explain your own beliefs as much as you feel able to, but make it clear that you’d be very happy if as far as possible she made up her own mind.

Personally, I always went for honesty with our daughter. I cannot abide all the lies that are told about Father Christmas, so I explained all about the myths that surround ‘him’ when she was less than three. That didn’t stop her having just as much fun as other children, looking forward to the celebrations and the general atmosphers of fun and togetherness. Nor did she ’spill the beans’ to other childen. It spared her finding out one day that we’d systematically lied to her because we thought it’d be good for her.

She’s now at university and I asked her recently if, with hindsight, she’d have preferred not to have been told. She said she didn’t know either way, since she’d known since such a young age, but didn’t think that knowing that Father Christmas was a big fib had taken away any of the fun of Christmas.

As far as the even bigger ‘fib’ is concerned, religion was rarely mentioned at all, any more than fairies at the bottom of the garden, Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny. But, strangely, I do now regret that she’s so uninformed about stories from the Bible, as she has a real disadvantage when it comes to literary references that mean nothing to her.

So, on balance, I’d say that it’s worth going through the Bible stories as fairy tales and just deal with any questions that arise in any way you feel comfortable with. I suspect that, in the end, children will always make up their own minds, no matter how much we agonise and whatever we tell them

By: Emily

Emily — Mon, 29 Nov 2004 17:23:26 +0000

I too was raised Catholic as a kid (USA) and became an agnostic around age 11, never got confirmed, went on to fiddle with Buddhism, paganism and etc for about 20 years, and now have somehow arrived back at Christianity.
Why? Because out of curiosity I actually started reading the Bible (something I’d never done very extensively as a kid) and found it (particualarly new testament)to be excellent and an eye opener. Also went to various christian churches out of nostalgia, and ended up staying.
But I agree–no one can force anyone.
Many people I know who were never baptized or brought up as anything end up confused, satan worshippers, or just depressed, thinking when they die, they will be dead meat.
Kids seem to like religion–teens seem to disdain it–and many people like me, when they hit their 30s or 40s, end up going back to it with a friendlier eye.
I’d vote towards a non “forcing” religious education in the religion of your choice, and yes, of course she will make up her own mind.
Best of luck!

By: Suziboo

Suziboo — Mon, 29 Nov 2004 12:41:13 +0000

I think you can believe in God without necessarily being religious. Churches, or places of worship in general, have little spiritual interest for me personally, I feel that if your do believe in (a) God then you would accept that he(or indeed, she)is everywhere- what is the point of only praying in a church? Since my husband and I are of differing “branches” of Christianity we agreed that we should teach the broader ideals, which as someone pointed out, are common to many faiths, and not worry too much about the details- we both feel that it’s not really important if they go to Sunday school or catechism or whatever else, if they grow up to be tolerant loving human beings then I’ve succeeded as a parent. As someone who believes in God, I will leave it in his hands whether or not they do too. It will happen if it’s meant to.

By: Jason Stone

Jason Stone — Mon, 29 Nov 2004 10:12:08 +0000

I really don’t feel qualified to comment on how you should introduce your child to the religions of the world, since I am a recovering Catholic.

But, I would like to comment on your fine taste in american television. “I pity the fool” that did not watch that show. Lieutenant Starbuck aka “Faceman” was my favorite.

I am fascinated by the fact that it was so popular in Britain.